Batman '66: Structure over content
It should come as no surprise for anyone who have seen a few episodes of the old Batman tv-show from 1966 that there is a certain blueprint to an episode. Very often it’s by the numbers hardcore style, even more-so than Friday the 13th from part 2 and onwards. In most other cases this doesn’t work and makes one want to scream. Batman, however, transcends this. It manage to make it charming and goofy fun. Exactly how they did that is a mystery but I suspect that someone flips hamburgers in hell for this.
The teaser
In the first of a new two-parter—the first two seasons were to 90% always two-parters as they had two time-slots a week—it always starts with some kind of mischief. Someone gets kidnapped, a thing gets stolen, whatever. Then a sharp cut to commissioner Gordon who when he hears about this shocking deed always go and pick up the Bat-phone as only the caped crusader can solve this. The police force in that town is at this point nowhere near the efficiently of Gothman Central or for that matter, the 1920s Chicago. The law enforcement suck in all the possible ways here. Anyway, Gordon calls for help—all to eagerly cheered on by chief O’Hara who doesn’t know a thing about real police work.
Meanwhile, Bruce and Dick and aunt Harriet does something in their mansion. It can be reading Latin, study archaeology or geography—it’s most of the times however tied to the crime of the week. “Gosh darnit Bruce, it I only took my French more seriously!” Alfred picks up the Bat-phone and lures Bruce and Dick away from the oblivious aunt Harriet with a corny excuse like “Dick, come along. We must look at my stamp collection.” She’s there to make it less suspicious that two grown men lives together and hangs out in a cave—but someone never really got around to telling the scriptwriters this. Bruce and Dick run to the Bat-poles and then the title sequence starts. I don’t know how the pole dresses them in their leotards, but I suspect that it actually makes the costumes around them when they slide down.
Bat-climbing next to the window
In the first of a two-parter, Batman and Robin almost always climb up a wall—at least in the first two seasons. After that, shit happens to the structure but more about that later. When they climb up the wall with their very thin rope by holding it and walking on the wall. After a short while they come to a window, it opens and a famous face pops out. They have a brief chat and then they heroes continue their journey. Why Sammy Davies Jr and the likes felt compelled to be a part of this show I have no idea.
The cliffhanger
The first of the two episodes ends in a fight that the dynamic duo loses despite their cunning plan of using written sound effects like “booof”, “ooouf” and “crack.” The bad guy puts them in a death-machine so horrible and so over-worked and so fucking stupid the mind boggles. I’ve seen them put into a huge bucket filled sand so that they can’t move and a giant magnifying glass aimed at their heads. It’s on that level all the time, and the villains leave them there to meet their fate. The cliffhanger ends with their impeding doom as the voice-over is horrified about what he sees on screen.
A fate they always escape thanks to some ingenious Bat-thing in part two. To escape and survive the coldness of Mr Freeze Batman wears Bet-thermo underwear, which must be so hot in normal cases that he should be set on fire in normal room temperature, but no. He can wear those in any room, any temperature without being affected one bit.
Season 3 and Alias
Season three is wonky. It’s bizarre even. A lot of stand alones that are linked together. It is like an inverted episode of Alias season one. You do know Alias right? JJ “Lost” Abrams spy-action-thing with Jennifer Gardner that is rather bad? Good. as you know then, Alias in season one starts with a cliffhanger and she wins in the teaser—pretty much like in Batman—but then after the title sequence it’s a new story that has nothing to do with what was in the teaser.
Batman season three starts out as normal, they do their case and beat the bad guy but in the very end of the show but then in the third act at the very end, a new storyline starts as they hear about some other villain stealing stuff. No rest for the wicked. Had they only tied it together in real-time the show would have been a proto-24 as well.
This is how it is. Always. When you think about it, it seems pretty boring. But thanks to charm, silly family values and stupidity, it manage to get away with it.
